Thirty-five weeks pregnant with a toddler and I keep missing the afternoon set. Does missing one a day undo the programme?

Update from the prolapse worry thread: I was seen by the perinatal service on the 6th. Lovely physio, very thorough, examined me and gave me a programme. Three sets a day, each one a set number of squeezes with holds, plus some quick ones.

The morning set happens in bed before my son wakes up. The evening set happens on the sofa once he is down. The afternoon set has happened exactly twice in ten days, because the afternoon is a eighteen month old, a bump, a nap that may or may not happen, and me falling asleep sitting up.

So is two out of three a day basically pointless? Am I wasting the whole thing by missing the middle one? I am due in about four and a half weeks and I am starting to feel like I have already failed this before the baby is even here.

Two out of three is not pointless. I did mine at traffic lights on the school run for months, which counts, apparently. Can the middle one go at a traffic light?

Attach it to something that already happens every afternoon whether or not the nap does. Mine is the kettle. For you maybe the second nappy change, or whenever you sit down to give him a snack. It is not about finding time, it is about not having to remember.

Nadia, I am so glad you were seen, and before the birth. I am not a clinician, and your perinatal physio is the person to ask about your own programme, but I can tell you what the guidance actually says, because I think it will take some of the pressure off.

The dose most often quoted, from NICE NG123, is at least 8 contractions performed 3 times a day. That wording dates from 2006 and was carried forward unchanged into the 2019 guideline, so it is a long standing minimum rather than a precise threshold that collapses if you miss a set. It is a floor to aim at, not a pass or fail line. What the evidence for supervised training rests on is weeks of regular practice and reviews, not perfect days.

The more useful question is the one to put to your physio at your next contact: "if I can only reliably do two sessions, how should I spread the work?" Some programmes can be rearranged; that is her call, not mine. And Lindsey is right about attaching it to something that already happens. That is the single most consistent thing people on this board say kept them going, and it is the theme of keeping it up after discharge, which applies just as much now.

You have not failed anything. You were seen at thirty-four weeks with a toddler at home, which is more than most of us managed. The site's page on pelvic floor training in pregnancy covers what the guideline says about the antenatal period.

Esther Vaughan said:

It is a floor to aim at, not a pass or fail line.

Thank you, I needed someone to say that before I spiralled any further. Messaged the physio through the portal with exactly that question.

Afternoon set now lives at snack time. He gets raisins, I get ten squeezes. Day three and it has happened three times.

Raisin time is now my favourite exercise cue I have heard on this board.

Physio replied: she moved some of the afternoon work into the evening set and said two good sessions are better than three rushed ones. Still pregnant, very large, raisin set going strong. She has booked me a postnatal check for after the birth, so the programme continues on the other side.